If you ask a stranger whether everything is good in their life, there’s a 90% chance that you’ll get a negative answer. Most people aren’t satisfied with various areas of their lives. The reasons why can range from financial problems to problems in their personal lives. Gender, age, and profession rarely change something — it’s quite noticeable that most people — regardless of those three things — aren’t too happy.

But why? After all, most of us have some kind of understanding of what happiness is — that kind of happiness that escapes from us all the time. Why can’t we claim that happiness, at least for a while?

People have two answers for this question.

The first is the most common one and sounds something like “I’m a slave of the situation I’m in, and there are others to blame for my unhappiness.” After that a list of the guilty unrolls. It could be parents, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, an angry boss at a hated job, the government, etc. The list can be quite long as people are often glad to try and pin the blame on others.

The second answer isn’t given as often, and that is: ‘I’m the one who is guilty in my being unhappy”. This is the answer of a mature personality, one who is responsible for his/her life and what’s going on in their life. When a person like this starts to realize that he/she is living not like he/she is wanting or trying to, they start seeking the answers why. And here is where the most difficult and interesting events start.

Any attempt to change ourselves and, as a result, our lives, is actually an attempt to implement some changes in our so-called “Self-conception”.

A person’s “self-conception” is their core. It is what makes us who we are. Our “self-conception” is:

а) how a person imagines him or herself

б) how a person evaluates him/herself and models his/her behavior

в) the expectations based on the individual’s own understanding a person has.

In our lives, our “self-conception” is like a complicated piece of software, while our physical body is like the hardware. Since our early childhood, we are creating our “software” according to situations and events in our lives. Our software is created more intensively when we are teenagers and the process slows down with age.

All other things — our relationships with people, our self-esteem and quality of life, are results of our “self-conception”. We act the way we do due to algorithms and sometimes we can’t change our actions even if we don’t like their results. We aren’t satisfied with our own actions but we keep doing them just the same. This will continue until the moment new changes are introduced into our “self-conception”. There’s no doubt that we can try to change our lives, but, in fact, there will be no quality changes until we begin to change ourselves.

Unfortunately, even a person with a strong will won’t be able to cope with the task without some basic level of knowledge. There are two general ways to change such a deep and basic thing as our “self-conception”.

The first one requires a lot of costly actions — studying psychological practices, meditation, and meeting professional psychologists. Self-understanding, self-actualization, self-realization — all these terms are well-known for a modern person who struggles from frustration and an absence of inner and outer harmony.

The second way is much shorter — instead of spending money and energy to work with a problem from afar, it’s possible to address this “self-conception” directly and to investigate it and make some changes. Today this method is the most advanced, effective and updated.

But how is it possible to best understand one’s “self-conception” and change it?

Modern methods of working on this problem have been utilizing new methods. Using knowledge of what “self-conception” is and how it works, we find that it’s possible to create a universal algorithm that will provide us with the detailed content of our “self-conception” and all its components. This will help us find the most problematic areas. And, as a result, it will help us correct them.

One of these modern tools that will help us with this is the Love’n’Graph program. This application allows the individual to build a full picture of their personality. They are able to see the differences between their current self as well as get a picture of their ideal self, seeing all the reasons why they behave the way they do.

Such a deep analysis is necessary for solving problems connected with one’s personal life. Having a picture of your own “self-conception” allows you to compare it with the “self-conception” of a current or potential partner. All conflict points are laid out and it becomes clear what needs to be changed in order to achieve harmony, personally and in your relationships. The individual also gets an answer addressing whether it’s worth it to save a relationship with a certain person or better to just start a new one.

Working with a modern, technically innovative product like Love’n’Graph is one of the most practical ways to take a long, hard, sober look at one’s life and understand what needs to be changed to achieve happiness and satisfaction in one’s life and relationship. Thanks to the modern age, it is now possible to understand and better ourselves using these “pocket psychologists”. Out of those that exist in the marketplace today, the Love’n’Graph application ranks first!