Recently, a female friend who is a successful journalist, was complaining to me about her difficult family situation. She has been quite restrained and reserved about her personal life, and I realized that it was opening up and revealing her feelings to me. She said she was unable to solve the existing problems alone, that she didn’t have any close friends, and that she didn’t feel like visiting a psychologist but didn’t not want to live like this anymore.

I advised her to try using the Love'n'Graph application, and then asked her to give me feedback about the program, as well as describe her impressions. The names in the following description have been changed, all the rest is a complete citation of her feedback.

“To make it clear why I was interested in the program and how it influenced me, I would like to start with a little story about my situation. I am 32 years old and have been married for 5 years. When getting married, it seemed to me that I was doing the right thing — I was 27 years old, which was rather late I think, and my husband was the right candidate — even my parents liked him.

At first I even liked my new role as a wife. But as time passed, I began to catch myself thinking that I did not want to go home right from work. I was terribly annoyed by some of my husband’s habits (in the beginning they seemed quite okay with me), and I became angry. Over time, the situation only got worse. I began to shrink into myself and did not answer my relatives’ question about what was going on (there was no wish, and I did not understand how to explain what was happening to me).

By the fifth year of marriage, I wore myself and my husband out completely. My husband tried to improve the situation somehow, but I was not happy. I blamed myself for this and got angry, annoyed, and withdrew into myself.

It was during this period, that I tried out the

Recently, a female friend who is a successful journalist, was complaining to me about her difficult family situation. She has been quite restrained and reserved about her personal life, and I realized that it was opening up and revealing her feelings to me. She said she was unable to solve the existing problems alone, that she didn’t have any close friends, and that she didn’t feel like visiting a psychologist but didn’t not want to live like this anymore.

I advised her to try using the Love'n'Graph application, and then asked her to give me feedback about the program, as well as describe her impressions. The names in the following description have been changed, all the rest is a complete citation of her feedback.

“To make it clear why I was interested in the program and how it influenced me, I would like to start with a little story about my situation. I am 32 years old and have been married for 5 years. When getting married, it seemed to me that I was doing the right thing — I was 27 years old, which was rather late I think, and my husband was the right candidate — even my parents liked him.

At first I even liked my new role as a wife. But as time passed, I began to catch myself thinking that I did not want to go home right from work. I was terribly annoyed by some of my husband’s habits (in the beginning they seemed quite okay with me), and I became angry. Over time, the situation only got worse. I began to shrink into myself and did not answer my relatives’ question about what was going on (there was no wish, and I did not understand how to explain what was happening to me).

By the fifth year of marriage, I wore myself and my husband out completely. My husband tried to improve the situation somehow, but I was not happy. I blamed myself for this and got angry, annoyed, and withdrew into myself.

It was during this period, that I tried out the Love'n'Graph application on the recommendation of a friend. The first task was to describe myself, gradually passing blocks of questions and tasks.

Naturally, I started working without much enthusiasm. I thought that this was another test that will give me 3 standard options of three-line descriptions. But just after passing the first tasks I realized that I had actually started using my brain. I had begun to think and answer those questions that initially seemed simple, but it was them that determined my life, thoughts, and actions. They ruled me! And I had never even thought about it. It was much like an internal shower with fresh cool water that has washed and showed me my inner portrait.

For example, in the block “Life Goals” I had to arrange 16 options in order of importance.

How surprised I was when I saw that I had put family and children at the end of the list!

In the JOB section I received the highest marks. Yes, I’m really a workaholic, and I like my work very much.

It turns out that I lied to myself for several years, I forced myself to play the part, but that’s not what I really needed. And as a consequence I directed my aggression out at the whole world and at my husband who did not have to do anything with it!

I began to compile a portrait of our family with another mood. The “Motives for marriage” block made me look at my marriage in a new way. I returned to it many times. I had to choose 5 main driving motives. To my chagrin, I finally came to the conclusion that I was motivated not by love or desire to start a family, but by the desire to fit, to be a kind of “excellent student” in this too (as I am used to doing always in my life). It would seem that it’s very easy to understand, but I just never thought of it.

Then I deepened in the analysis of family relationships and realized that I almost always used a negative assessment. The Family Happiness block almost made me cry.

In the Family profile the questions often made me think about how the situation is evaluated by my spouse. I decided to fill in the Family profile, assessing like I thought my husband would. Of course, it was hard to realize that he could have same claims and discontent, and perhaps even more than mine.

I studied the results long and hard, and I got more and more confident in the action I knew had to be taken. I knew it was time to act decisively. I asked my husband to fill out our Family profile. I realized that I would not be able to find a better foundation for a serious conversation with my husband.

Yes, my husband is a wonderful man, worthy of respect and all the best. But our assessments of our family life differed radically. When we compared my assessments (my personal assessment and the one I did for my husband) with my husband’s, it became quite clear. He lived in complete ignorance that I was so unhappy in the family and believed that we were totally fine. And I thought that for him it was also as uncomfortable and hard as it was for me.

Problems existed only in my world! Why had we never discussed this?

We have returned to these results many times, analyzed separate blocks in details, comparing, thinking, discussing.

I felt that while working in Love'n'Graph together we got closer to each other than in the entire history of our family. I do not know what decision my husband and I will finally make, but I’m sure that now we will not act blindly but will be sensible, lively, and come to a mutual decision. We have identified critical points and outlined general actions that need to be taken. We identified our similarities and tried to determine how this is valuable for both of us.”

I often think that, being able to do all this work before the start of our married life, that we would not have found ourselves in such a devastating situation. After becoming aware of the internal reasons for our actions, it becomes much easier to predict and manage the effects. There appears a very different level of responsibility for our actions. And if you still find yourself in a dead end, it is important to be able to look at your inner labyrinth from above, change your route, and proceed to your target.

application on the recommendation of a friend. The first task was to describe myself, gradually passing blocks of questions and tasks.

Naturally, I started working without much enthusiasm. I thought that this was another test that will give me 3 standard options of three-line descriptions. But just after passing the first tasks I realized that I had actually started using my brain. I had begun to think and answer those questions that initially seemed simple, but it was them that determined my life, thoughts, and actions. They ruled me! And I had never even thought about it. It was much like an internal shower with fresh cool water that has washed and showed me my inner portrait.

For example, in the block “Life Goals” I had to arrange 16 options in order of importance.

How surprised I was when I saw that I had put family and children at the end of the list!

In the JOB section I received the highest marks. Yes, I’m really a workaholic, and I like my work very much.

It turns out that I lied to myself for several years, I forced myself to play the part, but that’s not what I really needed. And as a consequence I directed my aggression out at the whole world and at my husband who did not have to do anything with it!

I began to compile a portrait of our family with another mood. The “Motives for marriage” block made me look at my marriage in a new way. I returned to it many times. I had to choose 5 main driving motives. To my chagrin, I finally came to the conclusion that I was motivated not by love or desire to start a family, but by the desire to fit, to be a kind of “excellent student” in this too (as I am used to doing always in my life). It would seem that it’s very easy to understand, but I just never thought of it.

Then I deepened in the analysis of family relationships and realized that I almost always used a negative assessment. The Family Happiness block almost made me cry.

In the Family profile the questions often made me think about how the situation is evaluated by my spouse. I decided to fill in the Family profile, assessing like I thought my husband would. Of course, it was hard to realize that he could have same claims and discontent, and perhaps even more than mine.

I studied the results long and hard, and I got more and more confident in the action I knew had to be taken. I knew it was time to act decisively. I asked my husband to fill out our Family profile. I realized that I would not be able to find a better foundation for a serious conversation with my husband.

Yes, my husband is a wonderful man, worthy of respect and all the best. But our assessments of our family life differed radically. When we compared my assessments (my personal assessment and the one I did for my husband) with my husband’s, it became quite clear. He lived in complete ignorance that I was so unhappy in the family and believed that we were totally fine. And I thought that for him it was also as uncomfortable and hard as it was for me.

Problems existed only in my world! Why had we never discussed this?

We have returned to these results many times, analyzed separate blocks in details, comparing, thinking, discussing.

I felt that while working in

Recently, a female friend who is a successful journalist, was complaining to me about her difficult family situation. She has been quite restrained and reserved about her personal life, and I realized that it was opening up and revealing her feelings to me. She said she was unable to solve the existing problems alone, that she didn’t have any close friends, and that she didn’t feel like visiting a psychologist but didn’t not want to live like this anymore.

I advised her to try using the Love'n'Graph application, and then asked her to give me feedback about the program, as well as describe her impressions. The names in the following description have been changed, all the rest is a complete citation of her feedback.

“To make it clear why I was interested in the program and how it influenced me, I would like to start with a little story about my situation. I am 32 years old and have been married for 5 years. When getting married, it seemed to me that I was doing the right thing — I was 27 years old, which was rather late I think, and my husband was the right candidate — even my parents liked him.

At first I even liked my new role as a wife. But as time passed, I began to catch myself thinking that I did not want to go home right from work. I was terribly annoyed by some of my husband’s habits (in the beginning they seemed quite okay with me), and I became angry. Over time, the situation only got worse. I began to shrink into myself and did not answer my relatives’ question about what was going on (there was no wish, and I did not understand how to explain what was happening to me).

By the fifth year of marriage, I wore myself and my husband out completely. My husband tried to improve the situation somehow, but I was not happy. I blamed myself for this and got angry, annoyed, and withdrew into myself.

It was during this period, that I tried out the Love'n'Graph application on the recommendation of a friend. The first task was to describe myself, gradually passing blocks of questions and tasks.

Naturally, I started working without much enthusiasm. I thought that this was another test that will give me 3 standard options of three-line descriptions. But just after passing the first tasks I realized that I had actually started using my brain. I had begun to think and answer those questions that initially seemed simple, but it was them that determined my life, thoughts, and actions. They ruled me! And I had never even thought about it. It was much like an internal shower with fresh cool water that has washed and showed me my inner portrait.

For example, in the block “Life Goals” I had to arrange 16 options in order of importance.

How surprised I was when I saw that I had put family and children at the end of the list!

In the JOB section I received the highest marks. Yes, I’m really a workaholic, and I like my work very much.

It turns out that I lied to myself for several years, I forced myself to play the part, but that’s not what I really needed. And as a consequence I directed my aggression out at the whole world and at my husband who did not have to do anything with it!

I began to compile a portrait of our family with another mood. The “Motives for marriage” block made me look at my marriage in a new way. I returned to it many times. I had to choose 5 main driving motives. To my chagrin, I finally came to the conclusion that I was motivated not by love or desire to start a family, but by the desire to fit, to be a kind of “excellent student” in this too (as I am used to doing always in my life). It would seem that it’s very easy to understand, but I just never thought of it.

Then I deepened in the analysis of family relationships and realized that I almost always used a negative assessment. The Family Happiness block almost made me cry.

In the Family profile the questions often made me think about how the situation is evaluated by my spouse. I decided to fill in the Family profile, assessing like I thought my husband would. Of course, it was hard to realize that he could have same claims and discontent, and perhaps even more than mine.

I studied the results long and hard, and I got more and more confident in the action I knew had to be taken. I knew it was time to act decisively. I asked my husband to fill out our Family profile. I realized that I would not be able to find a better foundation for a serious conversation with my husband.

Yes, my husband is a wonderful man, worthy of respect and all the best. But our assessments of our family life differed radically. When we compared my assessments (my personal assessment and the one I did for my husband) with my husband’s, it became quite clear. He lived in complete ignorance that I was so unhappy in the family and believed that we were totally fine. And I thought that for him it was also as uncomfortable and hard as it was for me.

Problems existed only in my world! Why had we never discussed this?

We have returned to these results many times, analyzed separate blocks in details, comparing, thinking, discussing.

I felt that while working in Love'n'Graph together we got closer to each other than in the entire history of our family. I do not know what decision my husband and I will finally make, but I’m sure that now we will not act blindly but will be sensible, lively, and come to a mutual decision. We have identified critical points and outlined general actions that need to be taken. We identified our similarities and tried to determine how this is valuable for both of us.”

I often think that, being able to do all this work before the start of our married life, that we would not have found ourselves in such a devastating situation. After becoming aware of the internal reasons for our actions, it becomes much easier to predict and manage the effects. There appears a very different level of responsibility for our actions. And if you still find yourself in a dead end, it is important to be able to look at your inner labyrinth from above, change your route, and proceed to your target.

 together we got closer to each other than in the entire history of our family. I do not know what decision my husband and I will finally make, but I’m sure that now we will not act blindly but will be sensible, lively, and come to a mutual decision. We have identified critical points and outlined general actions that need to be taken. We identified our similarities and tried to determine how this is valuable for both of us.”

I often think that, being able to do all this work before the start of our married life, that we would not have found ourselves in such a devastating situation. After becoming aware of the internal reasons for our actions, it becomes much easier to predict and manage the effects. There appears a very different level of responsibility for our actions. And if you still find yourself in a dead end, it is important to be able to look at your inner labyrinth from above, change your route, and proceed to your target.